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The Case for Better Polyamory Representation

A friend of mine, Stormy Styles, related strongly to a recent post she saw on Facebook. She copied and edited the text a bit to add some of her own thoughts, then posted it to her Facebook timeline. The reaction was remarkable. The post was quickly shared and copied and widely discussed. I copied and […]

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When Your Erotic Identity Is Damaged

There is an assumption that there are certain people so confident in their sexuality and erotic identities that nothing can challenge those aspects of their lives. Nothing could be further from the truth. I am living proof. This isn’t easy to talk about. Our society as well as our sexual and kink subcultures worship at […]

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Clean Whiteboard Sex

As I’ve pursued my own flavor of a sex life, I’ve noticed something creeping in that I didn’t like. Sex had become a game of matching up a somewhat rigid list of turns ons and turn offs, dos and don’ts. If someone who was potentially interesting sexually came into my awareness, my first instinct often […]

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Watts the Safeword Interview

I was interviewed by Pup Amp of the Watts the Safeword YouTube channel for their “12 Gays of Christmas” series. If you’re interested in BDSM and kink, check it out. It’s hosted by two gay men and much of the content is of specific interest to kinky gay men, but many other kinksters will find it interesting […]

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What’s Love Got To Do With It?

I delivered this speech on October 15, 2016 as the keynote address at Beyond Vanilla event held in Dallas, Texas. It’s a bit different than many of my usual speeches. Good evening. I’m having a great time here at Beyond Vanilla. I hope you are too. Thanks to everyone involved in creating and running this event. […]

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Honor History, Don’t Copy It

This speech was delivered on March 29, 2015 as the keynote address at the Colorado Leather Fest event held in Denver, Colorado. Good morning. I’ve had a really good time on this maiden voyage of this new Colorado Leatherfest event. I hope you have also. Thanks to everyone involved in creating and running this event. You’ve […]

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It’s All About Fun

This speech was delivered on February 14, 2015 as the Saturday dinner keynote address at the Southeast Conference of Clubs (SECC) annual event held in Orlando, FL. A video of this speech was recorded and can be viewed here. Good evening. I’ve had a really good time this weekend and I hope you have also. Everyone […]

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Kink Is About Connection

This post was originally published in the Bay Area Reporter for which I write a regular leather and kink column. You will find the original online version here. The topic of this post is something I feel extremely strongly about, and I feel it’s something that we don’t talk enough about in BDSM and kink education. […]

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Help Fund Research On Leather/BDSM/Kink

Richard Sprott, Ph.D., a well known and highly respected member of the academic community, is currently crowdfunding an important research project. In addition to funding this particular research project, if this funding process goes well, we could easily see this approach used as a model for supporting new research on leather/BDSM/kink in the future. This […]

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John Embry Leather Hall of Fame Induction Speech

I delivered this speech on April 27, 2014 to accompany the induction of John Embry, founder of Drummer magazine, into the Leather Hall of Fame at Cleveland Leather Awareness Weekend (CLAW) held in Cleveland, Ohio. Good afternoon. Today we are inducting John Embry into the Leather Hall of Fame. And while Mr. Embry did many good things […]

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