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Let’s Focus On What’s Important

This speech was delivered on January 26, 2014 as the Sunday brunch keynote address at the Southwest Leather Conference conference held in Phoenix, AZ. Here is a link to the audio recording of the speech on Leatherati. Good afternoon. For those of you I have not yet encountered in person this weekend, let me offer my […]

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Are Clubs And Organizations Right For You?

A few days ago when a friend posted on Facebook some of the drama that had developed in one of the clubs he belonged to and why he was resigning, I posted a response that ended up drawing quite a few follow up replies – some supportive and empathetic, some more or less neutral, and […]

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Handling Jealousy

This blog is dedicated in part to offering intelligent information, ideas and insights about the adventurous side of relationships. In order to explore that territory, the issue of jealousy is something that often needs to be acknowledged and confronted directly. For many people a large part of exploring adventurous relationship territory assumes some form of […]

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Have We Jumped The Shark?

A brilliant friend of mine, Steve Ganzell, recently posted something to his Facebook wall that I thought was so on target and well written that I asked him if I could replicate it here. It is one of the best and most important set of words I’ve read about the BDSM/kink scene in a long […]

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Using BDSM and Fetish to Sell Products (NSFW)

One of the complaints I hear occasionally is that aspects of the BDSM, leather and kink scene are being co-opted by outsiders and the culture generally. The video below is a prime example of taking BDSM and fetish imagery and using it to sell a product, in this case men’s underwear. Personally, I like the […]

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Leather Archives & Museum Announces Online Catalog

This is wonderful news! From the Leather Archives & Museum email announcement that was sent today: The Leather Archives & Museum (LA&M) announced today an OPAC (Online Public Access Catalog) of the institution’s book and magazine collection has gone live. The OPAC can be found at: http://webopac.infovisionsoftware.com/leather/ The catalog contains bibliographic records for over 12,000 […]

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Are We Too Inclusive?

A friend of mine, Aaron Duke, posed the following question on his Facebook wall: “In the leather, kink, fetish, and BDSM community, we say we are ALL inclusive. Are we truly ALL inclusive or are we exclusive? What does being ALL inclusive look like? What effects has/will being ALL inclusive have on our community?” Below […]

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So, You’re Kinky And Thinking About Coming Out

Every so often an article I read is so well written and thoughtful that I have to share it. A friend of mine recently wrote an article published in the San Francisco Society of Janus’ Growing Pains newsletter and it’s brilliant. It says much of what I’ve been saying about kinksters coming out, but far more […]

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